I don’t just build software; I architect digital liberation.
By day, I am a high-velocity consultant specializing in the classic power trio of Perl, MariaDB, and Template Toolkit. I’m the one you call when your legacy code needs a modern soul, or when your database architecture requires the kind of discipline that only 18 years of sobriety and an obsessive eye for detail can provide.
I believe the best systems—like the best lives—are built on a foundation of unapologetic authenticity. Whether I’m vetting property yields or refactoring the frontend for Grant Genie, I bring an "Alt" perspective to every logic puzzle. I’ve traded the "prim and proper" corporate camouflage for a silhouette that’s a bit more industrial, a bit more flamboyant, and a lot more honest.
Precision Engineering: I don’t do "good enough." I do "10/10 Production-Ready."
Subversive Strategy: I look for the "messy" cracks in a system where the real growth happens.
High-Frequency Focus: I work with the intensity of a man who knows exactly who he is—and isn't afraid to let the world see it.
I’m currently based in Spain, chasing history, perfecting my Spanish, and ensuring that every line of code I ship has as much "Camp Swagger" as the flares I wear to the club.
I’m here to help you get to breakeven—and look delectable doing it. 🦇💗